SIX EXITS

First off I just have to say how much I loved, loved, loved all your comments. Even the anonymous ones. They sparked a lot of thought for me and reinforced my feelings. You, dear Internet, are awesome. Gold star. I didn't have a chance to respond to them so I thought I'd take a chance to do that now. Our first contestant is...... Cham!

Here is his comment:

Disclaimer: This is a general observation. This has nothing to do with Ashlee, but now that she brought the subject up.

There is nothing more disgusting than the words "I am a nice person." How do you know you are a nice person? Did some committee do an evaluation? Did they give you a favorable rating? Does opening doors for others while cheating on your taxes deem one "nice"?

Does saying what you think behind someone's back and not to their face make you nice? Does lying to your best friend about how fat she actually looks in those jeans make you nice or does cluing her in before she walks out in public give you the Better Homes nice seal of approval?

Women are obsessed with being seen as nice and good, just ask our new friend, Lauren Cleri, her level of goodness just cost her $200K. Personally, I'd rather have the money. It is impossible to judge niceness, much less your own niceness. If you want to meet the meanest person alive, just listed for those 5 little words, "I am a nice person."

Oh, and I dedicate the above post to that awful woman in the Canton Safeway who I called every name in the book yesterday, she deserved it. Her stumbling apology to me afterward rang hollow. And no, I am the only one on the planet who will admit to being not a nice person.

First off Cham, the old Ashlie would have told you to button up and quit spelling my name like a certain lip-syncing Simpson sister. The new Ashlie has decided not to mention anything. Mostly because your page states that you are a body-builder. While I'm pretty sure I could have taken down that 70 year old man, you, my friend may have been a greater challenge. So therefore I'm not going to even mention it (again). Capice?

Anywho, I thought that Cham brought up an excellent point. A lot of people (who are pretty much the devil incarnate) like to label themselves as "nice". I'm pretty sure that it boils down to the fact that people are 1) full of themselves 2) idiots & 3) completely oblivious. This is why I decided to quit using the word "nice" in my second post and switch it up to kind. For that I would like to say, "Thanks Cham!" this one is for you....



Okey doke. The second contestast of the day is....drum roll puleeze.... anonymous! Here is her/his comment.

Anonymous said...

It's all a choice now huh? Before it might have just been what you thought you had to do...now you do who you are. I think it's called maturing...but a 70 year old...yikes girly. I know your momma taught you better.

This comment was made after I wrote Part One of my manifesto. I really wanted to shout from the rooftops "Don't you judge me Anonymous!" in my best white trash drawl, but I didn't. Mostly because I knew how the story ended (with me NOT beating down a 70 year old). They didn't. So here is my response to Anon.

This is what my momma taught me. To stand up for myself. To let my heart and my faith be the guide in all situations. This doesn't always provide a peaceful ending. My mom is famous for telling the story of the time when I waited next to a car (with a friend) for over an hour to confront a woman on a bumper sticker she had that I most certainly didn't agree with. When the woman returned to her car I let her know why I thought she was wrong. I was in third grade. She was soooo proud that I had stood up for my beliefs. But? I'm pretty sure that she'd be less than thrilled with the way I handled myself in these situations. Not necessarily because I decided to stand up for myself, but in the way I chose to do it.

As far as the choice part? I think that its always a choice. You can choose to treat others with kindness or animosity.

Last but not least I'd like to button it up with a great comment from my girl, Um...Yum!.

I think I didn't find these incidences funny because I deal with people like that all the time, and it infuriates me. I absolutely hate rudeness. I don't see why that woman couldn't have opened the door, and what did she have to argue back with? "I'm too stupid to know how to open a door!" And the bacon? What was his problem bitching at a customer? I'm the first person to say the customer is never right, but if a customer says something is wrong, you don't argue with them like that. Gah! And I wish you had told that old man off. I don't understand why people think it's ok to talk to people like that and treat people that way.

I understand taking the high road and all that. I really wish I could do that, and I do actually most of the time but I actually don't feel good about it. I'd feel better if I could punch those assholes in the face. :oD I agree with the person who said that there is a fine line between being nice and being a pushover. I'm glad you stood up for yourself even if you believe you shouldn't have because it's obvious to me that people see you and think they can treat you like that, and sometimes they need to be told that they can't.

Wow girl, I agree, agree, agree with you. And just for the record I was moments from punching door lady in the face. Don't get me wrong. I'm not going to stop standing up for myself. I am and will always have a strong personality. Basically I'm just going to kick it back a few notches. I'm going to take it from complete bitchitude to kind assertion. For all of you dear people who thought I was demoting myself to driveway-like status getting run over multiple times a day, you DO NOT need to worry. If my momma taught me anything it was that we need to stand up for what we believe is right! If I had to do it all over again I would have still confronted each of those people, but just gone about it in a different fashion.

If someone attacks you, you are automatically going to go on the defensive. No resolutions are reached, just a record high setting for your blood pressure. My new goal is to react with firm kindness. Let people know that I am not a punching bag whilst showing them that I am a person who is reasonable and kind. That seems fair doesn't it?

Anyway, I love you peeps. Even (and especially) my friend anonymous. Have a kind AND assertive day.